One of the biggest challenges we may face is to walk into a room full of people we don’t know, business or social environment, and to walk up and engage with someone in a conversation. Many of us say this is a fate worse than death!
In ‘Ask Powerful Questions’, released in early 2017, Will Wise explains how the questions we traditionally ask are virtually meaningless when it comes to establishing connection. He introduces a set of practical tools for accessing and understanding others by changing the way we ask questions, Will shows how to transform "How are you? - I'm fine, thanks" into a conversation that changes not only how you lead, but who you are as a person.
It took years of research, university teaching, and hundreds of client projects for Will to formulate his concept behind the art of asking powerful questions. In his book, Will breaks it down into six simple steps and a framework. The Asking Powerful Questions Pyramid™ shows you how to build:
• Intention
• Rapport
• Openness
• Listening
• Empathy
After you've clarified your intent and begun to practice establishing rapport and being open, your next challenge is to ask open-ended questions. Rapport is a great foundation for this.
Effective open-ended questions generate responses that are unrehearsed and unscripted almost story-like in quality and the answers often invite more questions.
The key to asking open-ended questions is to be aware of what your questions start with. Open-ended questions generally start with Why, What, and How. In some cases, Where and When can also form open-ended questions.
Consider this, we cannot be open and have a need to be right at the same time.
Having an open mindset requires you to be open to surprise and willing to explore the unknown around you. If you find yourself knowing how people are going to respond or if you find that you are seeking an answer to support your own view, then you are not being open to those receiving your questions.
Powerful questions can be used everywhere: from the business meeting room to the beach or gym, the dinner table to the local store. If you want to connect with employees at a team building retreat, hone your leadership skills as a new boss, improve the company culture where you work...this book is for you. If you want to navigate difficult conversations with your spouse or a friend, or practice presence-based listening with your kids...this book is for you. If you want to become a better educator and facilitate an ice breaker conversation with colleagues...this book is for you.
Your self-work for open-ended questions is to establish rapport with three more strangers, find something that you are naturally curious about, and ask an open-ended question (dropping the Why). Listen. Notice how the other person responds. Notice where the conversation goes and enjoy the ride.
Reference: Will Wise: ‘Ask Powerful Questions: Create Conversations That Matter’
